Shelley Zalis on Women, Leadership and The Future of Men

First it comes to light that the CEO of J Walter Thompson may have made some very disturbing remarks about raping women for fun Then we have two uberCEOs Sir Martin Sorrell and Maurice Levy debating in the media whether or not misogyny in our business actually occursamp160and if itamp8217s even a serious issue That is from a manamp8217s point of viewAll of which got me thinking about Jack Myersamp8217 new book The Future of Menamp160amp160a study of modern masculinity that asserts that men amp8220are being progressively outmaneuvered outsmartedamp160and outresourced by womenamp8221 Myersamp160advises that todayamp8217s men must understand acceptamp160and embrace this fact amp8220if they are to have a positive and productive roleamp8221 in a world in which women are an equal forceMyers makes a clear and forceful argument supported by thorough research and data ranging from anthropology psychology biology economics politics and pop cultureamp160to human sexuality The trends propelling the ascendancy of women are undeniable So why are so many men still refusing to take us seriouslyI reached out to Shelley Zalis the unstoppable force who founded The Girlsamp8217 Lounge for a completely uncensored discussion about The Future of Menamp160and what she thinks it means for women Shelley is pictured at topKristi Faulkner Shelley you spend a lot of time in dialogue with women executives in The Girlsamp8217 Lounge which you host at major events all around the world Do you see the profound changes that The Future of Menamp160reportsShelley Zalis Well Jack is absolutely right We are at a flipping pointamp160 Women are getting more aggressive and men are getting more in touch with their emotional lives tooamp160 Women have to embrace masculinity and men have to embrace femininity The time has come to not only acceptamp160but to celebrate the feminine and masculine archetypes we all embodyKristi The macro trends Myers reports indicate that women are gaining ground But in some companies misogynistic attitudes are still pervasive Do you see women and men getting closer to equality in businessShelley Equality Not everywhereamp160 But I do see how important balance has become in business today and that is progress We have to collaborate as equal partners of different sexes Gender equality and neutrality are not an eitheror they39reamp160an and Transformation is happeningamp160slowly but it will only become the norm if we do it togetherKristi For women to succeed professionally we need the support of our male colleagues donamp8217t you think amp160Shelley Men are definitely a part of the equation of womenamp8217s success None of us will succeed if weamp8217re working in a silo We have to work together in an open and honest way Though I don39t think men always know how to make a difference for women the way women need them toKristi The Future of Menamp160contends that men and women are both impeded by patriarchy Clearly it works against women but whatamp8217s the problem for menShelley We enter the work force at a 5050 malefemale ratio The problem starts to happen at the middle level when women have to make choices around family and career Thatamp8217s why we call it amp8220the messy middleamp8221 Women get trapped there but men don39t I believe men do want to promote women and celebrate women to make the table better balanced but men donamp8217t know what to say because they havenamp8217t been trained properly They donamp8217t know how to coach women they donamp8217t know how to comfortably encourage womenamp8217s strength and power and controlKristi It is frustrating that we outperform men academically but when we get to the business world amp160where men are in charge amp160the dynamics change and weamp8217re expected to work harder to prove our valueShelley We have to start a whole new narrative Men have great personal relationships with mothers and sisters wives girlfriendsamp160and daughters amp160but how can men do better at working with women We have to start a new narrative about parenting too sharing responsibilities so the onus isnamp8217t always on her And men have to train other men to appreciate the diversity women bringKristi Iamp8217d say The Future of Menamp160is injecting new ideas in the conversation between men and women But whoamp8217s responsible for fostering the same kind of diversity in thought in the business world where bias is still prevalentamp160amp160amp160Shelley Diversity is the wrong word Inclusivity and care is a better descriptor What was allegedlyamp160going on at JWT is unacceptable behavior for any leader There should be no tolerance for prejudice of any kind ever especially not from a CEO Look a leader is not just someone who motivates embracesamp160and encourages but someone who makes all people feel comfortable in the organization and inspired to be a part of the teamamp8217s longevity No leader should have a biased mindset Leadership is about activating a vision and demonstrating the core principals that the company stands forKristi You have two sons in their twenties How do you see their future as menamp160Shelley They have always been taught that men and women are equal My husband and I both are professionals parents and partnersamp160 There is no amp8220typicalamp8221 male or female role in our house We share the responsibility of homeamp160and have demonstrated the importance of both of us having an equal role However that39s not helped by the objectification of women in media Weamp8217ve had to emphasize that women are not objectsamp160 Itamp8217s a challenge but what do we want this generation to be inspired by 96 of media is stereotyping women and men The masculine role is complex too not just machoKristi I think that sums up The Future of Menamp160perfectly Women are evolving but so are men Women donamp8217t want to be men We just want to be equal to menamp160 Weamp8217re making significant progress and men who resist the force of change do so at their own riskShelley Trying to be a man is a waste of a woman as someone once saidThe opinions and points of view expressed in this commentary are exclusively the views of the author and do not necessarily represent the views of MediaVillagecomMyersBizNet Inc management or associated bloggers amp160amp160

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Shelley Zalis on Women, Leadership and The Future of Men

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